The Transylvania Times -

Investigative journalists recently discovered that Trump’s maternal, great-grandmother’s maiden name was Zagovor. They also discovered that Zagovor was the surname of Obama’s great-great-uncle on his maternal side. But this is not all. Putin’s great-great-grandfather changed his surname from Zagovor to Putin because of a family scandal that involved a great cheese heist.

Further, it was reported in the New York Post that the three were planning to kidnap Mickey Mouse and clone him so they could build a Disney World in Wuhan, China. This plot was discovered by Michelle Obama and...